The Vermillion Skull Grinned

"...but what about the butterflies...?" --U.P.


"...but what about the snakes...?" --T.L.


*Debate between two professors over the issue of clearing the thick vegetation at the back of their dorm. (UP, Miag-ao)


I heard my former professor back in college is now a resident of the very famous institution in the western part of Mandaluyong. No less than my sister confirmed this as she also belongs to the same college as I did--as well as the professor. I guess fate really does catch up with all of us sooner or later.

I heard a lot of horror stories about Ms. Panama (not her real name) when I was still a freshman; about how she conducted lectures that would make the March Hare and The Mad Hatter proud and her natural predisposition for terrorizing unfortunate students who offended her sensibilities. The way she conducted her classes was based on her template that all students on the quest for knowledge should work hard for it. Ergo, you do all the research that you think is vital for this course: If you're taking English I (basic communication skills), then find any books that's related to the subject, then create a --in her own words--"well organized compilation" of what you learned and submit it at the end of the semester. Bibliographic entries/list of no less than 50 books from the library was required during the first week to see if the students knew what they were looking for. I submitted 50 titles of rock albums just to submit something (using the library at UPV was like killing people for the cause of preserving life). i.e: Corgan, William Jr.,Basic Communication. (1993), Smashing Pumpkins Press. See if she can see that.

The way I saw it, however, was that it was an elaborate excuse not to perform actual lectures every meeting so she could indulge in her sadistic hobby of persecuting students she didn't like. She did check the attendance and asked questions related to the subject every now and then, but not to gauge how much her students (subjects, actually) knew, but to humiliate anyone unfortunate enough to be called who doesn't possess any strand of wit or sophistication to answer in kind. Most of whom were gays, the token promdis (country bumpkins) and token kikays (sassy women). She had no tolerance for homosexuals (gays, lesbians, bis) but I found what really made her furious beyond belief were the kikays. One girl she found wearing makeup in class got a taste of the teacher from hell reputation when she was told to wipe all the colors off her face. Natural beauty, she said, needs no artificiality to conceal it. The promdis, she admonishes without mercy but does it in a seemingly helpful way. Mild sarcasm comes to mind, if there is such a term. 


I remember one time she called a timid-looking girl who was obviously not from any city--she looked panicky and nervous everytime, one suspects she's mumbling every prayer just to be ignored by everyone especially her professor. This time, however, the Gods turned a deaf ear. Everything, from her footwear to the way she tied her hair weren't spared. This, the prof did in a "nice way". Simon Cowell from American Idol seemed polite and considerate in comparison.

Ms. Panama belongs to the old-world conservative thinking I'd like to associate with the movie Pleasantville where everyone was expected to behave a certain way to give the viewers a semblance of a normal and happy life. Either that or the uptight and humorless aristocratic Victorian-era highbrow pompousness one can always see in caricatures (i.e. Tim Burton's Corpse Bride) from all sorts of pop culture references. The total lack of tolerance for others who do not fit into the mold of how anyone is supposed to behave and act jumped at me when I was her student.


Back then I already sensed something was slightly off-kilter. It was just a matter of time when the rigidity becomes too much for everything to break.